How the Elf Creates Christmas Doubters

Tomorrow is December 1st.  The official day that the elf arrives from the North Pole.  I am all for Christmas spirit but things have gotten severely out of hand with the “Elf on the Shelf”.  Not only is it a major pain to be trying to figure out new places to move it to every night but it has made my kids completely question Santa all together.

If you have not heard of the elf on the shelf, consider yourself lucky and hope you never have to deal with it.  The idea of it was supposed to be simple.  The elf arrives from the North Pole and keeps an eye on you to report back to Santa whether you have been naughty or nice.  The elf moves around every night to get a new view.

After 2 years of hearing how lucky the other kids at school were, I caved and bought one.  Oh boy have I regretted it.  My kids love waking up in the morning and looking for it.  The initial twinkle in their eyes was priceless.  Overtime however, it has made them question the magic of Christmas.  Each parent handles their elves differently.  For most other Santa related activities, that is fine because the kids are on break and can’t compare notes.  Since the elf comes out while school is in, it becomes the water cooler talk at the playground.  I find myself lying to the kids the entire month of December.  If your kids are old enough (mine were 5 and 7 when we started) and have  a curious mind, these questions are sure to follow.

  • How come all these kids have an elf and we don’t?  – They came home from school everyday retelling the stories their friends told them.  There was a magical elf that appeared on their mantel, they had to look for it every morning.  They were so sad that an elf hadn’t come to visit them.  “Santa already knows that you have been very good and doesn’t need to send anyone to check in on you.”
  • If the elf comes from the North Pole, why is it sold in stores?  – As soon as you walk into many retailers, the elf is sitting there in a box waiting to be purchased.  My sister  told my kids that the elf isn’t bought at a store. “The elf spirit must come down from the North Pole into the elf overnight”.
  • How come Neil has 2 elves? –  If you are going to to bother with 2 elves, beware. “They must be extra naughty so Santa needed to keep 2 sets of eyes on them”.
  • How come the elf didn’t move last night?  When we did finally get one, remembering to move it once we were sure the kids were asleep was so difficult.  Because mommy was tired and forgot?  No.  “She must not have seen what she was looking for there and needed to stay an extra day”
  • How come the elf’s handwriting looks like yours?  The kids started writing letters to the elves since they heard that is what their friends do and the elves wrote back.  I tried to disguise it, I really did.   “I don’t know, must be a coincidence”
  • Jayden’s elf already came before Thanksgiving, how come ours isn’t back yet?  Seriously people, you want to do this for longer?  “Maybe our elf was visiting family for the holiday”
  • It’s past Christmas and I saw Maya’s elf still at her house.  Doesn’t it need to go back to the North Pole?  To their defense, most delinquent parent’s children are too young to know the difference.  But please if you are going to have older kids over, put the thing away!  “Maybe his travel arrangements were delayed”
  • Why is our elf in the back of your closet in June?  Shit.

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